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Defining Love

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Hi Friends, Can you believe it's already September? These months have been flying past us and soon it'll be a whole new year. It's in these very fast-paced days that I've been trying to find the time to reflect on the things I've learnt and unlearnt over the past few months and years.  If you're someone who knows me, you'll know how deep I can get when it comes to life and the little things. The little things that aren't so little. Lately, I've had to redefine what love means to me. I feel like I'm still growing up and every time I think I know what it means for me, God throws me a situation that makes me break it down even further to discover it at its core.  It's been especially hard to go through these experiences when you've grown up with a distorted view of what love looks like. Again, I ask myself what does love look like? Freedom. Non-attachment. Acceptance. I hear these words being used so often. Easier said than done. I cringe wh
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"New Year. New You"

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 Hi friends,

I'm not entirely sure when we should stop using the phrase "Compliments of the season" but since this is my first blog for 2021, compliments of the season to you and yours!

Well, it's definitely been an unpredictable few months for us all. South Africa has had it's second wave of Covid-19 infections which made things a lot more difficult for small businesses and our economies that were just starting to see a glimmer of hope for them. It's unfortunate but we're still pushing and praying for that breakthrough.

How are the goals for your new year coming along? Have you bothered to set any yet? I know we haven't had even a month of certainty but I think it's still a good way of outlining your plans for the year. I'll be honest with you, I haven't started with mine yet. I usually start to write them down based on the short-term steps I need to take and then go into long-term goals. Let me tell ya, last year put a bit of a damper on a hell of a lot of my goals. Just making it out alive was considered a goal that was achieved. I was pretty psyched about that one.

This year is more about accountability for me. Making sure I do everything I can to make things happen for myself. Whether they're tiny hoorahs or mega yeehaws. I want to be there for me as much as I can. I tend to do a lot of self-sabotaging in my life which ends up making me feel inadequate and sorry for myself. This is a bad thing which I need to work on and as I've been doing more reading into better ways of shaping my thoughts I started reading more about "Victim Mentality."

It's a very common complex or syndrome and it can really affect the outcome of your plans and basically your entire life. Now, the words "victim mentality" is something that has been used very often but it is not a formal medical term. We need to remember that as much as this term is being tossed around in casual conversations, the ones we think have this kind of way of thinking are undergoing some kind of distress which often creates these negative thoughts surrounding them.

We all go through hard times in our lives that shape our character and essentially who we become. We often use these as stepping stones to becoming wiser and more knowledgeable as we get older. We grieve our losses and failures and move through the pain but these feelings should never be something we live in forever.


This can be damaging to relationships/friendships if gone unnoticed. The great thing is you can always take a step back once you have acknowledged this type of behaviour in you or someone you know and offer up help. 

I've witnessed first-hand how much brainstorming can help a person when they feel stuck but there are so many other ways of encouraging a better mindset for yourself or someone you may know going through this.

I feel like in all the doom and gloom this past year has brought, self-development is one thing we can and should definitely invest in. I've realised how little I know about emotions and where they come from, how to better deal with these kinds of emotions and just being able to recognise it in others. 

We need to create the change, right?

Happy new week everyone!
P


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