Hey friends,
I've been a bit quiet lately. It's been quite an emotionally draining 3 weeks for the women in SA and throughout the world. How did we get back here? I am just so exhausted.
I am so greatly affected by
Gender Based Violence in my country and around the world. Joanne Chukwueke called it
the "shadow pandemic" in her article. I can't tell you the kind of anxiety this pandemic gives me. I'm thankful that I am able to work from home. Covid-19 has helped with my safety in terms of not traveling so often but for the many other women that still need to get out there and put food on the table for their families this world is not a safe space to walk through. Even living at home in times like this can be a very dangerous thing when you have an abusive partner.
How do you stop a
rape culture that has gone on for centuries? How do we create an environment where men and women can come out and seek help? An environment where they do the work to be able to get better. The day I heard about the horrifying story of
Uyinene Mrwetyana left me feeling absolutely sick inside. No more sicker than I feel every time I think or read about that story again. I didn't want to leave my house for weeks and this was only one of the very few times a crime of this nature had made headlines this big.
This culture that has been encouraged over many years needs to stop. People actually listen to you when you speak about your feelings now, men! Why won't you just talk about them instead of hurting the women you're supposed to be loving? You don't need to force affection. You don't need to hurt someone in order to receive what you want. You don't need to reinvent the wheel of a culture that holds no place in society. WE ARE HERE TO LISTEN. Help us help you.
The truth is, as much as we speak about these things there will always be communities that don't. There will always be men that choose not to come forward whether it be for themselves or others and still use their authority in a family or in a situation to move through unscathed. This shouldn't be something that we need to fight for every single day of our lives. To know that I will always need to be careful in choosing what to wear out in public to help men with their urges and to know that even then, that won't be enough. As an adult, your lust and appetite for something unspeakable are NOT anyone's responsibility.
Oh, and can we just talk about the many movies and books that encourage GBV? Did you know that there are videos recorded and published on the internet of rape? Yes. You read right. These are conscious acts. My brother made me aware of that when we had a chat early last week about the work he's been doing with a great team back home.
One of the amazing human's in the team is Romita Hanuman-Pillay. She is a journalist and Marketing/Communications Specialist by trade and also a passionate social injustice activist. Not only is she part of a group called Youth Against GBV but she also plays an active part in raising awareness about
human trafficking and animal cruelty. She is also a rep for
World Without Exploitation and an abolitionist with
Exodus Cry. I spent some time speaking to her about what she does and shared a few moments of likeness. So grateful for moments like that.
(Photos by: Romita Hanuman-Pillay)
While speaking to Romita about what my brother had told me about the rape videos, she sent me a link that many of you might have already seen. It's a
link to a petition to shut down Pornhub due to them aiding in human trafficking. This porn site was actually where many rape videos were and still are found. It is so distressing to read these
articles and know that we aren't doing enough to keep our girls safe.
This started off as a big rant for me but man am I serious about keeping our women safe. We need a safe world, a safe space to walk in. A place where we don't have to keep looking over our shoulder waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Here's to a great Wednesday,
Pran
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